Dancing With The Unknowing

Life sometimes invites us to be on the edge between knowing and unknowing. We can be okay with it and dance on that edge, or we can freak out. When it doesn’t have too much direct relevance to our personal life, not knowing can sometimes be adventurous and pretty wonderful.

Sojong Reminder from Anam Thubten for the month of Oct 2019

Dear Dharma Friend, Knowing is a cognitive ability that figures out the patterns, subtleties, divisions and nuances of reality. It fundamentally helps us to survive and to connect the relationship between cause and effect for all things. In some sense, it’s also a building block for our sense of reality from minor affairs to the biggest matters. Knowing itself has a tremendous sense of benefit, otherwise there would be no structure of reality. Life sometimes invites us to be on the edge between knowing and unknowing. We can be okay with it and dance on that edge, or we can freak out. When it doesn’t have too much direct relevance to our personal life, not knowing can sometimes be adventurous and pretty wonderful. For example, since solving the mystery of the universe doesn’t have a direct impact on our personal life, we can handle it if we don’t solve it or if it remains unknown. We don’t have to worry - many people think that they have solved that question already. However, what challenges us is when something unknown happens in our life. Perhaps we are sick and many doctors say different things. We don’t know what is happening and it can be challenging. Maybe we are waiting for a job interview and don’t know what the outcome might be. Maybe a loved one went through something difficult and we don’t know how they are going to come out of that experience. Fundamentally, life is built on that unknown state; it is full of unknowns. We don’t know what is going to happen to us or to the world; there is no assurance that things will move in a certain direction. This is why our ego rushes to conclusions or immediate remedies. When it feels like neither of these things are happening, it causes anxiety or fear. Our psychosomatic system is habituated to feel comfortable in the known, but it feels uneasy in the unknown. Therefore equanimity is desired by everybody and is praised as a high virtue in human spirituality. We read about it and we meditate on it. Yet, until the ability to be okay with the unknown is developed, it may not be possible to experience true equanimity. Our seeming sense of equaniminity can be shattered when an obstacle arises that is accompanied by the unknown. This is why learning to get used to and comfortable with the unknown is the key to happiness as well as our inner liberation. The reason the unknown scares us is that we feel like we’re not in control. There is nothing more liberating than to let go of our desire to be in control of our life and its ever unfolding connection with people and the world. Shantideva wrote a verse on letting go of control in his book, The Way of the Bodhisattva: “If the problem can be solved, why worry? If the problem cannot be solved, worrying will do you no good.” He’s reminding us to be okay in all situations. He’s also pointing out something quite essential - the futility of anxiety and fear. Human beings are resilient. We can actually develop such equanimity once we cultivate it. Our mind can be trained to not get attached to the psychological comfort of knowing or having control over things, and to instead find freedom in the realm of the unknown. There we can be lighthearted and have fun! During this Sojong, let’s hold the intention to take refuge in the truth - what Dharma is - the truth of all things that is alive, vibrant, and continuously changing. The unknown is part of that truth. With palm joined, Anam Thubten